Epic Default Productions

So after a cornucopia of random happenstance and pure craziness, we have survived the pure nerdy wonder that is known as PAX. It was a tremendous battle that truly tested our wits. But not only can we declare the experience a success, we can say that the prank we worked hard to set up this year was a success as well. Not only because we were able to perform the prank with great responses but, more importantly, because everyone had fun.

Big Bad MotherBoo

I Can See You!

It’s near the Texas / Oklahoma border, under a caffeine soaked stupor, that I begin to truly see the road for what it is; a bombardment of orange cones with misshapen and bloated twisted pieces of metal weaving and dodging to the elaborate plans of a human that truly can’t see the bigger picture. It’s within this massacre upon endlessly twisting pavement that I think of the present excursion. The goal: a temporal displacement that will eventually achieve sentience within the great northwest. But in reality that is nowhere near the goal. The reality is that the city has been infested with so many nerds that one can only be thankful that they are not in fact zombies, unless of course your wet dreams include the intricately played out scenes of mass murder of these undead whose souls have nowhere to go. But I’m getting ahead and behind myself here. The ultimate scene of nature in this annual right of passage is a convention of mass magnitude that truly does stretch the limits of nerddom. Just thinking of the sights, smells, and tastes to behold would make a lesser man weep in an overwhelming sense of joint joy and terror that can only be described as indescribable. But one can’t hold on to the thought for too long or else the immense emotions would distract from the task at hand, which is of the up most importance. It’s battle of will against a hydra of foes. Sleep deprivation, dehydration, driving exhaustion, boredom and the ever-present chance of a random encounter, law enforcement investigation and unplanned stop that has so many examples to prove the point that I cannot fathom why the chaos theory is still just a theory. So destructive and merciless are these elements that one must truly battle with all that they have in order to ensure that one’s mortal coil and financial stability stay intact. This is the prologue to a long venture that will truly test our limits. I can only hope we will maintain ourselves at least until we reach the northern lands. There we will receive support and if we can get that far, then we might just stand a chance. Pray for us. It is the only support we can receive at this point but it might just be the push we need. At this point though, I’ll just give God a smile and roll the dice.

So I noticed (out of a begrudging sigh from someone eye shuh-l not mention) that I started this whole webcomic review with rom-coms. In a pitiful attempt to regain the semblance of masculinity I swear up and down I have to any girl blind enough to sleep with me, I now present to you something more closely resembling a “proper” webcomic. Let the battle begin.

(Ranting to commence in 3, 2, 1…)

I’ve heard a lot of different webcomics tossed around as ones that I should start reading. Being the electro-lit fiend that I am, I always welcome suggestions for more webcomics to check out from friends, acquaintances, people who write me death threats dripping with disdain for my life and anything I’ve written, and the occasional hobo hanging around downtown (which really just leaves in awe for hours pondering which characteristics distinguish a webcomic as pro-hobo). But of course when your girlfriend starts bugging you about a webcomic that you should start reading, you really shouldn’t wait too long before you get started reading. Otherwise, you better be ready to suffer the consequences of your actions.

It took me 6 months before I got started to read Girls With Slingshots and thanks to the fine doctors at Houston Memorial Hospital almost all of my internal organs are still intact. But hey, at least I’m reading it now… right?

Let the horribly defensive webcomic review commence…

Staplehead Godzilla is attacking the city! We must flee!

So a long time ago (okay, maybe it was only the middle of March) in a galaxy far, far away (and by far away I mean a two-hour drive to Austin), I had a weekend full of fun and excitement. Hell, I was in Austin hanging out and was able to see Watchmen with a group of 10 other nerds: how cool is that? But I’d definitely say that one of the highlights of that weekend was a media expo in Austin called STAPLE. Needless to say, I was pleasantly surprised.

STAPLE! WOOT!

This is sort of a hypothesis that I came up with spontaneously, but don’t worry, it’s got some nerd implications to it as well that you might find intriguing. I figured all in all this might be an interesting forum to discuss this topic. How about I throw out the argument with a few examples and we can discuss it on the forums?

(–Totally Selling Out The Forums–)

So next weekend (March 7th) I’m going to be heading to a little shindig in Austin, Texas, called STAPLE! The Independent Media Expo. Staple! is an event to promote independently created media. They’re going to have 85 exhibitors of comics, zines, art, animation, literature and a slew of great people to enjoy it with. Some of the special guests and events they’ll have include:

It definitely seems like it will be tons of fun. So I hope you guys can make it out there. If you can, feel free to look me up to say hi, tell me how much you like the website, or simply punch me in the face. I’ll be the guy wearing the red kilt and grey fedora. It’s just my style.

Also look for a blog about the experience the following week. If you do say hi, you might end up in it. If you punch me in the face, you’ll definitely end up in it… just not in a good way.

Plan out your road-trip to STAPLE! and other nerd cons and expos across the country on our forums!

This is the first installment of a webcomic review I’m starting up. In typical style, though, I’m going to go out on a limb and start with something new and different from what you usually think of when you think of a good webcomic. Click the link to see what I’m talking about.

NO HUMOR!?!?!?!?!

A little late, but better than never. Come check out the movies, video games, and general fun in Rant Time With Anthony.

1.    Most Sterile, Clean Room Looking Zombie Game: Left 4 Dead

(-Blasphemy!-)

The prospect is seemingly simple; sit on your ass and play some games, unless of course you are talking Wii games or Sing Star which involve the frantic waving of arms and bobbing around while yelling somewhere near the note in question. That would be getting ahead of ourselves though. Where the challenge truly lies is the task of doing so for 24 hours. Now I know some that might consider this inviting. Others… well lazy at best. I originally considered it something that would have a potential of fun exponentially bordering partying with Hunter S Thompson and Johnny Depp for a weekend. Lots of fun at the time with some great stories but damn am I going to feel like shit for the next couple days afterwards on the come down. At a base level though, the thought of indulging one’s self in a multitude of gaming: computer, video, board, etc. It would send shivers down the spine of any true gamer.  What I’m left with… well, it was an experience to say the least.

Well I guess the best way to describe this whole shindig is to start from the beginning. After a hearty breakfast of Chick-fil-a and the setup of three televisions and five gaming systems, we were set. Some might consider this borderline technologic insanity while I would place it more along the lines of holding ourselves back a bit. We of course started with the standard Wii Sports. Bowling to be specific.  Nothing like an hour or so of yelling at digital pins to fall the fuck down to start a gaming fest. It’s setting the mood really. Then it went on to jumping back and forth between Mega Man 9 and the original Super Mario Bros. One might consider it blasphemy to be playing Mega Man 9 on the Xbox and Mario Bros on a macbook but I say that if the game presents itself, I’ll still play it. At the very least it presents me with something to make sarcastic comments about rather then going “Hulk Smash!” on the nearest squishy item in view while having long cursing combos spewing from my mouth because of constant fatalities on the aforementioned games. I decided to also fit in some DOTA to the mix just to add some flavor. Rampaging around as an undead and creating hoard after hoard of zombies is always a great way to relax the mind, body, and spirit to a point of inner peace and tranquility.

Of course then I’m still left with 20 hours of gaming so I decided to eventually say fuck you to inner peace in order to join my fellow gaming comrades in huddling around the warm glow of the 52” tv to get our Halo on. At this point I deem it necessary to point out the brilliance of two things: ustream and Xbox online. Jon had a brilliant idea to setup a ustream account to, well, stream online this gaming orgy. Having viewers adding conversations and commentary brought a whole other level of fun and a great way of adding further trash talking to an already messy vortex of testosterone and caffeine. Also, while I’m usually adamant in my hatred for Xbox online, I was infused with a reminder of a means in which it can be used for good. Utilizing Xbox online to play with fellow PAX IRCers was a brilliant concept in it’s ability to utilize a maximum of gamer population potential without diluting it with idiot fucks whose verbosity only stretches the bounds of creativity in cursing and who’s emotional maturity is somewhere near that of a 7 year old child. Playing online with a number of friends brought us multiple other Halo spin off games to try out and an end result of hours of gaming fun.

After this though, some relaxation was needed and a yearning to play a classic game had been tugging at my heart all day. Particularly with the presence of a NES and SNES, the urge to drop in a cartridge, possibly after blowing into it profusely for an undisclosed amount of time, and fire up the roots of my childhood could not be ignored. I eventually settled on something I knew I could pleasure myself for hours on: Super Mario World for the SNES. Indulging myself in the run around world with feather after fireball after Yoshi egg after haunting ghost nearly brought tears to my eyes. It was a wonderful experience to say the least. It’s at times like those that I truly do realize my roots and how far gaming truly has come… or fallen, depending on the person you talk to.

As evening settled in and a yearning for grub commenced, we eventually progressed to wholesome and maturing games like Grand Theft Auto. Okay, so not maturing exactly but amusing none-the-less. I also was able to fit in a rousing and hate-filled game of Scrabble. Honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever played a game of Scrabble with so much disdain being poured into every word. Stealing away triple word bonuses from people usually tend to lead to anger and frustration though. Afterwards I got my karaoke on through some Sing Star. Nothing like singing Time After Time to totally annoy the crap out of other people in the same household and across the web.

Eventually there were four of us reaching the tired time of 5 in the morning and with none of us capable of making a simple decision as to what game to play, we decided to leave it up to our insomnia-driven viewers to choose a game for us. After a multitude of terrible suggestions, we settled on Boom Blox and Castle Crashers to finish things out. On a side note, Boom Blox totally fucks physics up the ass and leaves it to cry in an alleyway bleeding and shivering with a vain hope to find peace at some point in the future. But we made it through tons of screaming and laughing. Fun times indeed. I also got to try out Castle Crashers, which is a cornucopia of humor and classic style gaming at it’s finest.

We slumped across the finish line in horrible gaming glory. We were packed with caffeine and in dire need of sleep but we were happy and felt like we accomplished something pretty darn good. Maybe it was because of being a part of the $100K+ contribution towards the Texas Children’s Hospital. Maybe it was because of actually completing 24 hours of gaming in it’s many forms. Maybe it was because we were horribly delusional and that was the only emotion we were capable of. But we were content with what we had done.

Hells yeah bitches!

The video this time…is a rare occaision where Jonny beats Anthony at Wii Bowling